Hunting Unicorns

Two hunters, Paul and Kurt, were in a lodge, making small talk. Paul asked Kurt, "So, what do you hunt?"

Kurt answered, "I hunt unicorns."

Paul was startled, but said, "Really? How do you do that?"

Kurt replied, "I find a virgin and hire her to help me. The virgin sits around in the woods until a unicorn comes to her. When it does, it sets off a snare."

Paul said, "Boy, they must be hard to find. I've heard of them, but I've never seen one."

Kurt said, "Yeah, and there aren't many unicorns around, either!"

Bedroom Window

Two hunters get up early one morning to go hunting. They live way out in the country, so all they have to do is walk from the first hunter's house across a field and into the woods to hunt.

But today the hunting's terrible, the worst they've ever had, so they decide to quit early. They emerge from the woods and start walking across the field to the first hunter's house. The second hunter, playing with his scope, aims his rifle at the first hunter's bedroom window and suddenly stops.

"Hey, did you know your wife's cheatin' on you with that guy who lives across the road from you?"
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Bear Hunting

Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it.

The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could. He ran pretty fast but the bear was just a little faster and gained on him with every step. Just as he reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat.

Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin.

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Killed With a Club

A Hunter walking through the jungle found a huge dead elephant with a pigmy standing beside it. Amazed, he asked: "Did you kill that?"

The pigmy said "Yes."

The hunter asked, "How could a little fella like you kill a huge beast like that?"

The pigmy said, "I killed it with my club."

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Hunting Deer

Two guys are out hunting deer. The first guy asks, "Did you see that?"

"No," the second guy says.

"Well, a bald eagle just flew overhead," the first guy says.

"Oh," says the second guy.

A couple of minutes later, the first guy says, "Did you see that?"

"See what?" the second guy asks.

"Are you blind? There was a big, black bear walking on that hill, over there."

"Oh."
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Bear Hunting

A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. He carries his trusty 22-gauge rifle with him. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone.

A moment later the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, "No one shoots at me and gets away with it. You have two choices: I can rip your throat out and eat you, or you can drop your trousers, bend over, and I'll do you in the ass."
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Hunting Skill

Two Polish guys went away on their annual hunting expedition, and by accident one was shot by the other. His worried companion got him out of the deep woods, into the car, and off to the nearest hospital.

"Well, Doc," he inquired anxiously, "Is he going to make it?"
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Religious Hunter

A man was out hunting. He just happened to be hunting bears. As he trudged through the forest looking for the beasts, he came upon a large and steep hill. Thinking that perhaps there would be bear on the other side of the hill, he climbed up the steep incline and, just as he was pulling himself up over the last outcropping of rocks, a huge bear met him nose to nose.
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